Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Next Day

Hah.  Here it is a full 24 hours later.  And the addendum to the Possession story. Now, when we left our story yesterday, the faucet's wall valve was turned off and it was sitting quietly planning its next attack of water spitting.

So, Hunnibunni comes home and logically says, we oughta turn the wall valve back on as otherwise, how will we know if the faucet has miraculously cleared itself of its possession.  Now, he is one smart Hunnibunni.  Exceedingly cute, too!  So, he turns on the water.

I am on my knees in the other room praying that Niagara Falls Pacific doesn't spew forth.  God loves me.  Nothing happens.  Nothing bad, that is.  So, we wait. The faucet sits there innocently.  It doesn't drip, it doesn't spew, it just sits there being faucet-y.  All evening I am on hyper-alert with my ears turned to the slightest watery sound issuing from the bathroom.  Blessed silence.

So, night happens and now it's day again.  I go in to see what awful things have occurred while we were sleeping.  The tub is still full of water, nothing is dripping and/or spewing and the floor is dry.  Oh boy.  Normal.

So, I call the plumber who is my new best friend.  He is still stumped but says to call Price Pfister to see why we can't get the aerator off the faucet.  Ok, I do that.  I get the inevitable computer who wants to know an amazing amount of information for no reason I can think of.  I finally get Maria, a human.

Maria is stumped.  She toddles off to speak with her supervisor who is also stumped.  The upshot is that PP will send me a new faucet.  Why?  Because the aerator is not made to come off.  I wonder what cement head thought that one up?

Anyway, aren't they wonderful?  Those Price Pfister guys?  I asked if they wanted the old one back.  No, I get to keep the thing.  I'm sending it to the Pope so he can exorcize it.

So then I call Ricky, the tile guy.  It's another dilemma.  He can only do so much of the travertine work until the new faucet comes in 10 days.  He has scheduling conflicts.  Crap.  So, being the magnanimous creature that I am, I say, Ricky, just do whatever you think is best and that will be ok with us.  They are coming tomorrow to do....what?  I have no idea.  Ok, now I gotta go downstairs and tell maintenance that they will be cutting stone in the common area and what time.

Naturally, I run smack into The Creep.  He is carrying a cup of coffee.  I am staring at this 5 inch praying mantis I see on the wall.  Ok, stand off.  My loins are girded.  The Creep flashes on tossing his hot coffee at me.  I can see the thought flickering across his mean little forehead like the banner in Times Square.

So, I point to the praying mantis and say, Look, Creep!  He actually grimaces and says there is another one in the stairwell.  Ok, the ice is broken.  Who would have thought that standing in the hallway discussing praying manti ( if mantis is Latin then this is the plural)  :D  would actually render The Creep ok to speak to again.  For a fleeting nano second I consider saying I'm sorry but I come to my senses and realize I am NOT sorry so why lie?  Virtuous, I is.  :D  My halo is shining merrily.

And who knew that there were praying manti in Hawaii?  Did you know that?  I had no idea.  I thought they only lived on the Observation Deck of the Empire State Building.  Another story for another day.

So, here we are.  The faucet is still nice and quiet.  I think it knows its time is short.  Hopefully, there will be no tile disasters tomorrow.  Maybe The Creep will go on vacation.  Maybe the praying mantis population will have him for breakfast.

Who knew?  32 years I have lived on this island and never saw a praying mantis here before.  I think I'll go do something nice and safe like make beads.  :D


WonderfulWire said...

So glad to hear you are almost pass this particular saga... oops! Or did I just jinx you :))) My sweetie liked your story :) and said "Oh yes, this is typical contracting!" and "maybe it could be a new career!" :p

AlmondJoy said...

The Praying Mantises must have been a sign for him not to mess with you. The females are known to bite the heads of males, ya' know.

AlmondJoy said...

>He has scheduling conflicts. >Crap. So, being the magnanimous >creature that I am, I say, Ricky, >just do whatever you think is best >and that will be ok with us.

Your contractors must love you!

MoeArt said...

I think you did! OIKS! I'll let you know if all hell breaks loose tomorrow. :)

MoeArt said...

Yeah but they bite the heads off their mates. The mere thought of anyone mating with The Creep is grounds for anti depressants. ;)

Melobeau said...

Oh Moe, What a sad saga. Only YOU could turn it into an essay that had me cracking up. I sure hope that the the worst is over and you'll soon be enjoying the fruits of all these birthing pains. I think I remember that in some cultures the praying mantis is a symbol of good luck......and may it be so!

MoeArt said...

Thanks, Anita! I hope they are good luck, too. The tile guys are here as we speak. Hopefully, the Creep will leave them alone. So far... so good.