Saturday, May 16, 2009

Fire Alarms

Ok, it's Saturday night. Just about 9PM, to be exact. I'm sitting here minding my own business reading my emails when the fire alarm goes off. Now, I KNOW they aren't testing at this hour. My poor kitties went air born and have disappeared. The alarm rings loudly enough and long enough that the entire 5th Division could arrive. Naturally, there is no fire. I now hear the previously mentioned Manager Man out in the hallway glad handing all the catatonic people. I am NOT opening my door. He might sneak in and turn off my newly found hot water.

Now, what I wanna know is this: why is it that fire alarms have absolutely NO effect on anyone other than to piss them off? Did you ever, in your life, see or even hear of someone getting up and running out of their place because they thought it was a fire? I never have. Not at home and not when I worked downtown. Same thing with the Early Warning sirens. NOBODY pays any attention to them, either. Except that they scare the crap out of our kitties.

A few months ago the one across the valley malfunctioned and that miserable thing wailed at us for almost 15 minutes. But, do you know that not one single person stopped what they were doing to look for falling bombs?

Car alarms. Did you ever hear of anyone saying..."oh, listen! Some poor person is getting their car broken in to"? Never. You hear LOTS of expletives and many wishes that the owner of the car loses various essential body parts but nobody goes to stop the thieves. We are complacent.

One day Fearless Leader is going to send his nukes over and we will all stand around wondering what that bright light is. Jeez. All this because of fire alarms.

I'm going off and read my thriller. :D


Andrew Thornton said...

Ha ha ha! You made me laugh out loud! I feel your pain. Good luck!

AlmondJoy said...

Yeah, nobody pays attention to car alarms. I think they should make "silent" car alarms. Work it so it just sends an alarm to the owner's cellphone ('cause everyone carries a cell these days), that way the neighbors aren't annoyed and they could catch a baddie red-handed since they wouldn't know they triggered anything.

MoeArt said...

Thanks, Andrew. I have achieved my goal of making people laugh. :) Thanks a bunch for coming to my blog!

MoeArt said...

That's a great idea! About the silent alarms for cars. Your esteem in the neighborhood would go WAY up! My favorite car story was the Joisey guy who took his gun and went out and shot a car that just kept blaring its alarm. When the cops got there they asked him What are you doing! He said, killin dis cah. :D I often wonder if he is for hire.

Michele said...

"Killin dis cah" Hilarious.

The fire alarm has gone off in my building only once that I can recall and, when it did, people just poured down to the door. As it turned out, someone's rotten grandchildren had pulled the alarm on purpose. I heard that the firemen had more than a few words with them.

MoeArt said...

I hope they duct taped them to the wall until they are about 35. I never heard of anyone leaving their building because a fire alarm went off. You may have the only building in the entire country that does that!

Ananda37 said...

I was sitting in work one day and the fire alarm went off. 2 years I've been working there, they test the alarm every Monday (it's a hospital). We've gotten so used to just sitting there through the alarms that nobody responded. Then I realised it was Wednesday. I jumped up and said 'that's REAL' so everybody got up and we left the building.