Monday, March 14, 2011

Why Me??

Now, you all know that I have puce issues.  And so, with that in mind, the following incident happened:

I am wanting to buy some new Swarovski crystals because, no matter how much stuff I have, I NEVER ever have the right size/shape/color for whatever it is I want to make.  Never.  How some people can actually decide to make something and have/order all the proper ingredients, I will never know.  I have 30 billion dollars worth of supplies and I never have just what the recipe calls for.  HOW does this happen?

Anyway, I am happily ordering all kinds of stuff, not one piece will be what I need next time but, no matter.  HAH!  I come upon a color (no picture) that is described as kind of an amethyst opal color.  Now, doesn't THAT sound pretty?, I innocently ask Self.  I should have known.  I should ALWAYS have known.  :(  It should have screamed at me when it didn't have a picture, right?  Wrong.  So, I order a bunch.

I toddle blithely through life until one sunny day, my package arrives.  Yay!  I rush into my studio and rip open the package.

Holy shit.  WHAT is THIS???  They have sent me 144 crystals the color of Geritol.  Swell.  This can't be right.  I think to Self, whiskey tango foxtrot is it with me and puce?  I hate puce.  I am plagued by puce.  But, I am now the unhappy owner of Geritol colored crystals.

So, I start thinking about it.  ALWAYS a mistake.  I have mental images of Adolph and Heinie Swarovski hitting the Jaegermeister and discussing their new puce colored bicones. " Und so, Heinie, dese silly Amerikaners vill buy anyting, ja?  Ja, Dolph, ve can make dese und sell dem to da stupid Amerikaners, dey vill buy dem und dey vill LIKE dem!  Ja, Heinie, have anodder Jaegermeister.  Danke, I vill."  I hate these guys.

So... it will cost me more than I want to spend to return them.  Plus, I probably won't endear myself to the company I bought them from if I insist upon knowing WHY they are selling puce bicones.  So, I put my new Geritol colored bicones away figuring one day I will find a use for them.  I am bummed.

The I get a new beading magazine and decide...YAY!  I will make a fun necklace for Spring and Easter... I figure God probably doesn't mind puce.  I whip out my Swarovskis.  (Heinie and Dolph are passed out cold).  Hmmm, there they are in their little baggie staring at me.  Puce bicones.  Hmmm.

So, I get to thinking.  (Oh NO!)  I recall Pammie, my beading guru, telling me that beads aren't always the color we think they are.  Oh yeah?  Nope, says she... they change color out of their confinement baggies and with/against other beads.  Ok, Pammie knows all.

I get out the puce abominations and dump them on my beading mat.  I now have a mat full of Geritol colored Swarovskis that are loose rather than confined.  Swell.  So, undaunted, I get out all my seed beads and start pairing them with the puce crystals.

OMG!!!! Pammie was right!  Heinie and Dolph...take a hike!  This is what I made, despite Heinie and Dolph's best efforts.  :D  Pretty Easter-ish, yanno?  :D


Pammie said...

You crack me up!!
See, Guru Pammie is always right, except when she is not so right...
It is beautiful, Moe, in spite of the "puce". =0)

Dana said...

This sounds like Never having what I need and getting some I don't like. You had me laughing all through your blog, but you did a damn good job on that necklace. You should be very proud. Probably be your most popular seller...Good Luck I hope you sell a lot of them.

Janie said...

Very interesting. I guess that should be true of color in a lot of situations. Beautiful necklace and earrings!

MoeArt said...

Thank you, Clay and Beady Pals! I hope it is a big seller. It really is pretty when you see it. :)

LadySaotome said...

"Heinie and Dolph" - I can so hear their dialogue in my head now. I laughed so much at this.

And it turned out so pretty - I'm glad they ended up working out after all. Maybe Heinie and Dolph should attach a warning label to their baggies? ;)