Friday, September 25, 2009



As you all know I have been trying, unsuccessfully, for weeks now to learn how to bead weave. I finally did it! Yay for me! And yay for poor brain dead Pammie in San Jose! Let us all have a moment of silence for all Pammie's brain cells that gave their all to the teaching of long distance bead weaving. So, here is the necklace I made! I'm just so proud of myself. :D Now I have to learn how to make earrings. Oiks.



Monday, September 21, 2009

The Bruce and Stencils


Well, Saturday night we were invited over to our friend Pat's home for dinner. Pat owns Morag another of the infamous Wee Cows. Go over there>>>>>> to click on the Wee Highland Cow site. As most of you know I own The Bruce and Bhaltair. Now, The Bruce is a total pill. He has a less than charming personality most of the time and all he wants to do is eat and drink. Hmmm, maybe he's not such a pill after all. :D

Anyway, we took The Bruce and Bhaltair on an outing to Pat's so they could see their Wee Cousin Morag. Bhaltair and Morag were perfectly congenial. The Bruce got a snootfull of wine but, for the most part, he was pretty good. Although, I am almost certain it is The Bruce to blame for "The Hot Pepper Incident".

Pat made arrabiatta which I probably have spelled wrong here. :( No matter how I spell it, it doesn't look right. Oh well. Hot red sauce.

Her DH Brian made a dandy dressing for the Greek salad. We were munching away when I decided to put more hot pepper flakes on my sauce. Pat makes it more mild as our collective Brians are hot food wusses. Pat and I like hot. :D So, I unscrew the jar and about 8 tablespoons of hot pepper flakes make a lovely arc onto my food. Oops. I scrape some off, share with Pat and eat the rest. VERY spicy. Yum. I know this incident is The Bruce's fault as he was sitting there laughing at me. Pat was sitting there wiping the sweat off her face. Was exceedingly funny as hot food doesn't do that to me at all. I have NO idea why.

Methinks Pat and the 2 Brians think it was because The Bruce had a wee bit too much wine. Naaaah. Never happen! Anyway, I just finished off the leftovers and The Bruce didn't get any! :D

I also found my stencils in a nice safe place. :( So, I got out the Japanese plum blossom (I think) design and stenciled this shirt. Ipo likes it. It's making me all happy that the stencil cream can be washed and dried! I followed Kathi's directions and heat set it with my iron then I tossed the shirt in the washer and dryer and all is perfect! Yay! Look for shirts on my Etsy soon!
Hmmm, Blogger is not letting me post pictures. :( I will try later. Bummer. THERE we go! It worked!

Friday, September 18, 2009

Stencils and Cleaning

I've had it. My brain is fried. So, here's the deal....

A couple years ago my friend's mom passed away leaving about 47 tons of craft items. Pat, my friend, is giving me all these things. Among all the stuff were 3 sets, in different sizes, of gorgeous, brand new Hawaiian quilt design stencils. Sadly, the 32 pounds of stencil cream were all dried out so I put the stencils away in a safe place. You know what's coming, right? Sigh.............

Ok, a year goes by and Pat calls me to come get another load of stuff. Hunnibunni and I go over and poor B is the mule. He loads up 2 cars full of stuff. Guess what's in 1 or 2 or 3 of the boxes? Loads of brand new T-shirts! Yay! I can now stencil on the t-shirts, put them on my Etsy and Artfire for $10.00 each and we'll all be happy. Right? Wrong.

This morning I am all bright eyed and bushy tailed and think, Self! Let us stencil t-shirts! Oh boy. I'm all excited. I toddle off to the cupboard where I am certain the stencils are. Are they there? Of course not. Most likely, in a fit of insanity, I decided to put them into an even MORE safe place. This place is so freaking safe I will never find them again! I am NOT amused.

So, undaunted, I decide, they are in this room and I will find them. They MUST be in the linen closet or on my closet shelf. You just gotta keep stencils flat, yanno? I tear apart the linen closet. No stencils. Ok, off I go to my closet. Oh brother.

I am up to my nose hairs in saved tissue, bubble wrap, post office boxes and general crap. Have I found the stencils? Of course not. I have found everything BUT! Wine is working its way into my consciousness.

But wait! Oh NOOOOO! I am out of wine. I despair.

Ok, I will be brave and continue looking for the stencils. I get out my little Shark vacuum as there seems to be 17 tons of cat hair everywhere I look. What I wanna know is just HOW does cat hair get all over the baseboards in the closet? Ok, I vacuum then wash it all off. The second I turn on the Shark, which is a dandy little gadget but sounds something like a sick Brontosaurus, the kitties go screaming out of the room where they were trying to be helpful by redepositing all their fur back on my nice clean baseboards. They are now hiding under a couch somewhere. I think this is a good place for them. By this time I have one side done. I have double closets in my craft room.

I decide I need a break. No wine. HOW does this happen?

Now, the big question is, of course, WHERE are those freaking stencils??? They must be hiding in one of my many craft cupboards. Oiks. Although, this is what I thought before this fiasco started. I think someone should invent tiny little transmitters we can put on all our stuff. You know, like when you can't find your phone so you hit this button and the thing rings until you find it? Like that.

Could you imagine how fun that would be if you gave someone something and forgot? You'd be beeping the thing all over the place and the person who had it would be driven to ... drink. Hopefully, they would have more sense than to allow their wine supply to run out.

Ok, my break is over so I have to return to the depths of the craft room. I'll let you know if I find the stencils. :)

And one more thing... our neighbors from some foreign port are cooking soemthing that smells so revolting it is triggering my gag reflex. My question is WHO thinks, gee, that smells like crap, let's eat it??? :(

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Ventana and John Denver

I was talking to my friend Kathi who tells me she is going to the Monterey Peninsula for a vacation. As you know, I used to live there. In Carmel. So, one evening a bunch of restaurant people decided we'd all drive down Highway 1 to Ventana in Big Sur and have dinner. In those days you could actually drive down Highway 1 and get to dinner in 45 minutes. From what I hear today, it takes a few hours. :(

Anyway, there were about a dozen of us. So, we get to Ventana. If you've never been to Big Sur, you're missing one of the most gorgeous spots in the country. Ventana sits high in the cliffs overlooking the ocean and is just gorgeous. It was then and I will presume it still is.

So, we have dinner then decide we'll go sit on the huge patio overlooking the ocean and watch the sun set and have drinks. We're there for an hour or so when who comes out but John Denver. He waves at us so we invite him over. He actually came and sat with us!

Now, not only was he a huge star but... what was he doing all by himself? We'll never know.

Anyhow, we ordered more and John went and got his guitar. Ventana closed for the night and all the help came and sat with us on the patio while John Denver entertained us with all his songs. He even sang us Calypso which hadn't been released yet. It was absolutely magical. Talk about a perfect night!

Then it was time to leave. We asked for our bill. John Denver had picked up our entire bill. Dinner, drinks, appetizers, wine, everything. He even left a huge tip. And we didn't know it until he was gone. Another amazing guy.

God bless John Denver!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Cleaning and Arnie Palmer

Ok, so yesterday I decided to really clean our all purpose room. B tells me... there are cobwebs on that book case. WHAT! I am anal. I do not DO cobwebs. I go look at the shelf. Oiks. There is a thingy of dust hanging down. It has cat hair in it. Revolting. So, I trots off to get my heavy duty headband and all the cleaning accouterments. As soon as I drag out the vacuum, the cats vanish. Good.

Ok, I decide I will actually put on my glasses so I can really see how bad this dust thing has gotten while I've been being lazy. Holy shit. The situation is GRIM. I look behind the computer table at the 9 miles of cables and wires covered with dust, cat hair and who knows what else. And start thinking about my bottle of wine. Sigh..........

Ok, there's nothing for it. I move furniture including the offending book shelf. I get down on my hands and knee and start. So, I'm cleaning away when I find a golf ball. A golf ball??? Ok, my Hunnibunni's golf clubs aren't too far away but I am NOT touching them. Yanno how men are afraid to go in our purses? Well, I'm avoiding his golf bag like the plague. So, I take the golf ball and toddle off to the closet where I know B has stashed away about 10 billion golf balls. I look on the shelf and think... WHAT is all this stuff??? There are, count 'em, THREE brand new golf gloves and 2 opened boxes of golf balls from Scotland that Chris sent him for his birthday a year ago. He is "saving" them. For what? Until they rot and he whacks one and black ooze explodes out of it? Oiks. There are also several loose mystery golf thingies that have absolutely no known use.

Ok, I decide these mystery thingies need to be consolidated. I gets a plastic food container from the cupboard and decide, I'll stash all this golf stuff in here and put some of this other crap in the cupboard in the bathroom. BIG fat mistake. I get the golf crap all nicely into the container and go into the bathroom.

Oh man. Now I have to clean the cupboard in there because everything is a mess and I need more room. An hour later I now have the cupboard in great shape. So, I toddle back to the closet. Now I have to clan the shelf where all the golf stuff was. Meanwhile, the computer desk still has wires all over until I can get back to it. My wine is hollering at me. One of the cats ventures out so I wave the vacuum cleaner hose menacingly at her. She evaporates. Smart kitty.

Now, because I am surrounded by golf stuff I start thinking about Arnie Palmer who is, in my book, one of the nicest men I ever met.

HOW did you meet Arnie Palmer, you query?? I will tell you. :D

Decades ago I lived in Carmel by the Sea, California. The home of Pebble Beach, Cyprus and Spyglass golf courses and several fancy tournaments. Arnie played in lots of them and always managed to eat dinner at The Pump House where I was his waitress. Arnie remembered me from year to year. Now, this is a seriously famous man who must meet thousands of people every year. HOW did he manage to not only remember me but my name? It's a mystery. Ok, fast forward a couple of years.

The Pump House closed and I was working at a place called The Hatch Cover in Carmel Valley. Again, I am the bar waitress. One evening in walks Arnie and his retinue. He flings his arms around me and shouts, 'MOE! You're in the wrong restaurant!" Now, I have not seen him for 2 years. Is this guy cool, or what?

Now, I was working with a PITA bartender named Ron Magieri. We did NOT like each other but had to work together. Ok. Ron is a BIG golfer and Arnie, naturally, is his hero. He begs me to get Arnie's autograph. Now, Carmelites pride themselves on never bothering celebrities. We had so many that we just let them be so they could be normal people and we protected them from tourists who wanted... autographs. Ron should have known better and I told him no, I wasn't going to bother Arnie. Ron nagged until I finally said, 'ok, i'll ask him". So, when Arnie was alone for a minute, I asked.

Arnie said ok then asked for Ron's name. I told him Ron Magieri. I thought Arnie would scrawl his name on a napkin and Ron would be happy. But, Arnie went back to his table and apparently forgot. I told Ron I had asked and to shut up already, there wasn't anything more I could do. But, I did feel bad. He was crestfallen.

Arnie and retinue finished dinner and called out goodbye to me. They left. Ron was sad and I was kind of bummed. Oh well.

About 5 minutes later the bar door opens and in walks Arnie Palmer. He marched up to the bar where Ron was standing with his mouth open. Arnie stuck out his hand and said, "Hey, are you Ron Magieri? Well, I'm Arnie Palmer and I heard good things about you and that you're a great golfer!" Ron just about passed out. Arnie brought Ron one of those color 8 X 10 stills which he'd personalized and signed. What a guy! I was just about in tears. Arnie gave me another hug, said, "see you next year!" and left. Arnie Palmer. My hero. What a guy! Every time I see him on TV I remember his kindness to a man he'd never met.

Do you know, I never had any more trouble with Ron. :D

Ok, so, I stop thinking about Arnie and go back to cleaning. Three hours later I am done. My hips are killing me and my wine has left itself out of the fridge and poured itself into a BIG glass. Ahhhhhh. I'm a happy girl.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

She's Baaaaack!


Oiks. I have been MIA! No excuses. Lazy. Done nothing. Lazy.

Anyway, I did manage to make a cool bracelet. It was pretty easy as beading goes. Here's a picture. Ok, 2 pictures. I gave it to my friend Angie this morning. She wore it right away. If I do say so myself, it looked really nice on her. :D :::breaking my arm patting myself on the back::::: :D

Friday, September 4, 2009

Beading and Mule Puke

Oh brother. :( Now, you all know that I have been MIA these last several days. There are a couple of reasons for this. One is that my wretched sister got me addicted to Farm Town on Face Book. I'm writing her out of my will for this. Another reason was that my hip was killing me. Ok, it's getting better. Yet another reason was serious dementia caused by trying to weave beads.

My friend Pam in San Jose has been trying to teach me, long distance, how to bead weave. The poor baby. I am driving her to drink. She sent me beads to use and a ton of really cool cabochons. And about 40 lessons, none of which I could do. Sigh.....

So, tonight I dragged out this natural stone cab that is tan and kind of mustard and dark brown. I love it. So, I spent an hour trying to decide what color beads would look really nice. I laid the cab right on top of them so I could see. Didn't help.

After hours of frustrating beading (with Farm Town breaks) I finally "got" it and was beading happily along. Following Pammie's directions. I ran out out thread about the time my Hunnibunni comes home so I leave the half done thing and we toddle off to the library.

A small aside here. Running out of thread is an amazing experience as when you start out, you cut about 6 miles of thread and need to hire a helper to pull it through the beads until the length becomes manageable. Actually, it never does become manageable as there is a "tail" hanging off which all the book insist must be a quarter mile long. Now you have not one, but TWO impossibly long threads hanging off your bezel, the diameter of which is about 2 inches. WHO thinks up these things?

And another aside... you also have to put a "stop bead" on your tail. :D Sigh......... This thing is supposed to keep the other beads from falling off. It's a total PITA. One book used painter's blue tape. I LOVE blue tape so I toddle off to the tape drawer and get some. Need I tell you the total annoyance of finding that not only has my thread wrapped around everything on my table but also the blue tape has stuck itself to my beading mat? I, of course, don't notice this until I am pulling the last half mile of thread through the needle when all the beads go air born because the tape is stuck to the mat, the map lifts off the table and flings all the loose microscopic beads half way across the room. I, naturally, bellow, "SHIT!" which causes our peacefully snoozing kitties to add themselves to my air born beads. I also cause our poor neighbors to reach for weapons as they have no idea why I'm bellowing. I seem like such a nice person.

Ok, when we get home from the post office, I pick up where I left off. Right. Stopping old thread and restarting with a new piece is a feat that needs a degree in architecture or engineering. Or both.

So, the directions say to make 3 to 7 rows. I do 4 or 5, I can' t really tell. All the beads are the same color, yanno? And they are smaller than gnat shit. So, I sits there beading away when I arrive at where I began ( because I am making a circle, yanno?) and oooops! Something is not right. The beads are kinda drunk looking. Well, that's ok. I continue on. I can hear all you experienced beaders groaning and laughing. You are right.

So, I make my 4 or 5 rows. Then I dutifully get the kind of burnt orange delicas and continue on. Wow. I did good. Mostly. Then I have to switch to even smaller beads. We had gnat shit, paramecium shit and now we have nano shit sized beads. All of this is making a nice cupping effect. So, I get all done and ready to finish the back.

But first, it's time to put the cab in to see how it looks before I do the back side. It looks like mule puke. Not only do the colors look gross but my 4 or 5 rows were 3 or 4 rows too many. It kind of looked like a 5 year old kid trying on her mommy's winter coat. I am most definitely not amused.

WHY do the colors look awful, you query? It is a mystery. They looked great with the cab laying on top of the beads. I think it transmorgrified or something the second I put it in the bezel. Anyway, tomorrow I will make another attempt with different colors. Or a different cab. Or both.

You didn't really think I was gonna show you a picture, did you? :D

I'm going to play Farm Town.